In life, there are rules for everything: restrictions in games of sport, driving regulations on the road, religious practices to abide by and everyday law and order for the safety and smooth functioning of our communities.
Some people like to have rules to follow, they feel safe knowing their exact boundaries. They obey the rules and can often be very judgmental of those who don’t do the same. In relationships, we should make sure that the rules benefit everyone.
Here are my family rules:
1. Accept that everyone has a different view of the world
No two people see the world in the same way. Accept that it’s ok to disagree. Stop trying to convince others that your way is the right way. That is so exhausting.
2. Respect others even if their values differ from yours
Everything is not black or white. Try to see that others are not either right or wrong, they are just different and that’s ok.
3. People are not their behaviour
Good people can sometimes display bad behaviour and vice versa. Change the behaviour not the person.
4. Every circumstance is created with a positive intention
I truly believe that people begin every relationship, every agreement and every action with the best intention. Things can get in the way and change the outcome, but try to see the positive idea behind the end result.
5. Everyone is doing the best they can with what they have
It’s easy for us to judge from a distance, but we don’t always know what is going on for someone else in their home, their work or their head. Let’s cut each other some slack.
6. There are no unresourceful people only unresourceful mindsets
It’s not that we can’t do something, it’s that we THINK we can’t do something and that causes frustration. Just do it anyway!
7. Everyone has within them the resources they need to succeed in life
Discover what success means for you and don’t give up until you find it.
8. There is no failure, only feedback
Allow yourself and others to fail and learn from each experience. Be open to feedback and growth will follow.
9. People with the most flexible outlook have the greatest influence
Bend with the wind a little. Stiff branches on a tree break and fall to the ground. It’s freeing to let go.
10. The meaning of communication is the response you get
Playing the blame game is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die! The reaction we get from people is as much our responsibility as it is theirs!