Feeling Connected to Your Partner

two hands holding in sunny sky
by Blisspot Wellbeing

Estimated reading time: 2 minutes

In relationships, being present to each other rather than acting out our unconscious thoughts and living in a state of reaction, can give us the connection and closeness that we innately desire. Being in a state of presence is when we consciously decide to stop living from fear and worrying our way through life. We can instead to choose to live life from love, our fullest expanded state. When we finally let go of fear and worry, we can be fully present to noticing and experiencing the true beauty of our partner or anyone we meet. In fact, we have opened up to seeing the true beauty of life that is around us all the time when we decide to tune into it: the blades of grass, the wind on our face, the small child who joyfully says hello and is so excited when you say hello back.

Being present is our natural state—it is what we are all looking for—is our soul calling us home, because it feels so good. Sometimes we are just looking in the wrong places for this feeling! We often look to the external to make us feel good inside. It is healthy to enjoy our materialistic world, but using it as a prop to hold us up, because we don’t feel good inside, is not sustainable.
When we are drawing on something or someone else to make us feel good, we can be using their energy, creating a win-lose scenario, which is not sustainable in the long term. When we can rest in our state of presence, our natural divine loving state—we can give and receive limitless love.

Ways to be present are:

  1. Meditation: seated and walking
  2. Immersion in nature: eg. gardening, bushwalking or beach walks
  3. Exercise: eg. yoga, tai chi, baseball, basketball, where our mind focused and beyond thinking
  4. Listening to music
  5. Art or any creative activity where we are consumed by the joy of doing the project (it’s the journey, not the destination!)
  6. Playing with children
  7. Making love
  8. Doing work, we love: puts us naturally in a state of presence

When we are present things flow, and we radiate joy, inspiring those around us. In a state of presence, we have so much more to give our partner and other relationships. In this state, we have gone beyond our layers and defences and can “see” others as the truly divine beings that they are.

couple playing basketball together

Ideally, in relationships, both partners engage in the work that makes them happy. Living your life on purpose, can prevent resentment (unexpressed anger), or even expressed anger, which can occur if one partner feels they are sacrificing their dreams for the sake of the other. We know when we are living our true purpose because we will fee alive— time passes quickly and “work” will seem like play!

“The master of the art of living makes little distinction between his work and his play, his labour and his leisure, his mind and his body, his education and his recreation, his love and his religion. He hardly knows which is which: he simply pursues his vision of excellence in whatever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing. To him, he is always doing both”.
~ Buddha

There may be times in our lives when we need to put our dreams on hold, due to financial constraints or for the good of the whole family. However, we can concurrently be taking steps towards making our dreams a reality, like studying, networking or researching what we need to do. We are the powerful creators of our world, and anything is possible.

To discover more see: Love Now eCourse

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