The Bliss Blog

How to Be More Loving

in Relationships
The Author
Blisspot
Posted on July 18, 2016

Estimated reading time: 2 1/2 minutes

Feeling more loving is a beautiful benefit of conscious relationships. As we accept all of ourselves and feel more consistently loving, we feel more loving towards others, EVEN if they don’t feel the same way towards us. If somebody indicates in some way that they don’t like us, we can still like ourselves. Self-love is something no one can take away from us.

 

  Learn more about Emotional Intelligence here  

 

We don’t know what is truly going on for others; we do not know what they are thinking or feeling unless they feel safe enough to open up and tell us. If someone does want to share their personal world with you, it is important to be supportive, to let them be and listen, in a non-judgmental way.

When we start to live consistently in a state of presence, it gives others the inspiration to do the same. Love is the most powerful force on the planet and living consciously and lovingly is the greatest gift we can give our partner.

When we live in the light, we see things clearly so we are not projecting our conditioning onto others. When we are clear, we are aware of our thoughts and emotions and have the ability to choose our actions. Rather than acting unconsciously, we can behave in a conscious way.


Being Loved


The easiest way to do this is

  1. Ask yourself how you are feeling right now, this could be frightened for example.
  2. Feel great compassion and understanding that you feel frightened (rather than judgemental).
  3. You may be aware of a limiting belief such as "I am disempowered". This awareness allows you to change it to something like: "I am empowered".
  4. This awareness allows you to make decisions around your behaviour and live in an empowered way for example.

The beauty of presence

We must become aware of what our mind is thinking to live in the state of presence, grace or conscious awareness.

Over the ages, it has been noted that merely observing the mind tends to increase one’s level of consciousness. A mind which is being watched becomes more humble and begins to relinquish its claims to omniscience. A growth in awareness can then take place. With humility comes the capacity to laugh at oneself and increasingly be less the victim of the mind and more its master. ~ David Hawkins.

When we know how to work with our mind, living in a state of presence becomes a natural way of being.

Awareness is an amazing thing: it can be razor sharp, for example, when we are focusing on hitting a ball with a bat. Alternatively, it can be broad, such as when we walk into a room and sense lots of things around us at the same time or sense “the vibe” of a room.

In our natural state, we would live in a very broad state of awareness and be in tune with the many things that are going on all around us all the time. When we need to write a shopping list or do a financial spreadsheet or listen attentively to a friend in need, we will focus all our attention.




Unfortunately, we often do it the other way around. We walk around highly focused, obsessing and reliving the latest drama or problem in our mind. Around and around the problem goes, consuming our energy and focus with stressful or anxious thoughts. By not witnessing things from a state of broader awareness, we can miss out on experiencing, the true beauty of life, that occurs in every moment.
We sometimes need to be highly focussed—when we write a list for example or listen to a friend in need—only to find our mind drifting to other things.

When we are feeling stressed or anxious, we can think and think to try to solve our problems. This doesn’t help thinking hard is not the source of our wisdom.

We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.

~ Albert Einstein

 

We need to go to another place. Problems are best solved from our intuition or inner wisdom, also known as our seat of awareness. To tap into this place, when we catch ourselves consumed in thought, we can instead “step back: and observe our thoughts— rather than thinking we are the thought.

It feels better to be objective rather than tangled up in, overwhelmed and consumed by our thoughts. When we find ourselves thinking, we can consciously decide to go beyond the stream of thought. It can be helpful to see our thoughts as objects floating in front of us. Observing our thoughts ultimately allows our mind to be calm and still and for us to rest in a state of loving presence.

 

Our unconscious stream of thought can steer the path of our life until we consciously choose a different way of being.

~ David Hawkins

 

  You can share your wisdom and make a difference. Learn more or post your bliss now  


To discover how to be more loving see: Love Now eCourse

 

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