Supporting Yourself with People You can Count On

in RelationshipsJanuary 1, 2019
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The Author
Vance Larson

I’m not a big fan of blood. I am not a big fan of family. I am a big fan of the run. Because it is the run that will define what your family looks like. It’s not those who were are genetically tied to you. Let me explain.

When it comes to your circle, it is the run that counts. Those who come running in when the storm hits, that is your circle. Those who go running out, are not. Far too many people stay in an unhealthy environment because they feel obligated to for the sake of blood. And at what cost? The cost of personal development and emotional security. And if you were to ask me, I would say that is much too high of a price. Some of the strongest circles are born out of desire. The desire to help and heal. Blood does not always do that.

While I am pro-family, I like to be clear on what family is. Family is anyone that supports your vision and encourages you no matter what. Yes, they will call you out when needed. But you can feel their intention is pure. It is not coming from a place of judgement or ego. It is a concern. They will cheer for you, comfort you and be there for you. They will not hold you down when you are down. They do not keep score and ask nothing in return, other than respect.

So this year I encourage you to pay attention to the run. Who is running to you when most are running away from you? Who do you run to, without questions asked? These are the people where you will get your power and find your voice. These are the people who will naturally enhance your life. And you may just be surprised. We often overlook the “run” because we have been taught a system that was imparted down to us for generations. But it’s a trap and an illusion.

I am a firm believer in showing respect, even when someone doesn’t deserve it. And there may be times when a blood family member falls into this category. Give yourself permission to let them run out the door. Be respectful, but be true to yourself. You as much as anyone (no matter what you have done in the past) deserve to have a circle that runs to you.

So do yourself a favor this year. Pay attention to the run.

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