The Bliss Blog

How to Embrace Change, Yours and Other People's

in Self-care
The Author
Vance Larson
This verified expert offers personal coaching services
Posted on Jun 18

People are allowed to change. Change their minds. Change their behaviors. Change their faith. Change their circle. We need to stop judging them and bringing up the past while they change. We don't know why they are changing and honestly it is none of our business. Unless they ask for our opinion, give them space to create whatever they want. Nothing last forever. Change is fluid and it is the one thing that we can count on. 

So many people end up in my practice because of change. Either they fear it, or they embrace it. Either way, change gets them walking though the door and while change can be uncomfortable at times, it also can bring hope. What doesn't help is when everybody bombards you when you are trying to make positive change in your life, as though you must remain anchored to your past. Why not show encouragement even if you feel their change is negative? While people are changing more than ever, they could use your support, not your judgement. 

 Change is fluid and it is the one thing that we can count on.

We have become a society of reminding people of their past. Let me let you in on a little secret. The past has no power on the present unless we let it. The minute one decides to make a change, the past becomes obsolete. Sure there maybe consequences that they may still be dealing with from the past. However, a shift in perception, can redesign the future so let's focus on that. Those that do not allow you to move forward by pushing you backwards, are the very ones who should not benefit from your future. 

As we change and elevate our awareness, the past becomes less and less important. If we carry hurt and pain from our past, let us cultivate that pain and turn it into power. There is no rule that say's we must own that pain. I love the saying Your new life is just one positive thought away. What does that thought represent? Change. Allow it to happen. Change is powerful. What we do with change can be an affirmation. When people are constantly reminding you of the past, it's hard to affirm the present.

Don't be the person that reminds them of the person that they used to be.

Let us open the doors to change by giving someone the support they need, if they are trying to better themselves. Don't be the person that reminds them of the person that they used to be. Whether it's a bad past leading to good or a good past leading to bad—change is going to happen. For example, when someone gets caught up in addiction, the best that we can is love them. Reminding them that they are hurting themselves and others, will often push them deeper into addiction. An intervention can be successful (if the goal is to get them to go into treatment), however if they are going to stay clean, that change must come from within. So honor the "quiet" and let them hear the voice from within. 

Life will change, just as people will. Let us encourage each other in the present moment especially when someone has decided to change. If you can't be supportive, be quiet. If you can't be quiet, simply remove yourself from their process because people are allowed to change and we should celebrate that.

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