There are many ways to partner with your significant other and today I want to discuss the idea of spiritual partnership. Many people have asked Dean Evenson and myself what is the secret of our long and happy marriage. In 2020 we celebrate 50 years of marriage! Although there are no quick and easy answers, I want to try to shed some light on that question here. When Dean and I first met in 1968, we noticed that we shared similar values and dreams for life. That common bond is probably what drew us together in the first place as we both wanted to use our creativity to help others and heal the many problems of our world. At the very beginning of our relationship, we had the shared values of spiritual service.
From that initial connection of wanting to serve, we have continued to evolve our consciousness and develop our spiritual path. There is no doubt that the success of our relationship has benefitted greatly from our common spiritual practice. We pray together, we meditate together, we dream together and we intend our life to be a certain way together. Also in our case, since we are both musicians, we sing, chant and play music together. Now I don’t expect every couple to be able to play music together, but you can consider singing, chanting, toning or drumming together. Those are musical endeavors that don’t necessarily require extensive musical training. Even listening to certain peaceful music or singing along with your favorite sacred songs together can be a spiritual experience.
The other thing we do requiring no special skill is that we bless our food before eating. A lot of people dive right into their meal, but we find that grace occurs when we take a moment to pause and express gratitude for the food that has come to our table. We honor the Earth from which it came, the farmers who grew it, the system that brought it to us, and the cook who prepared it. This may seem like a small thing, but praying to the ‘God or Goddess of your understanding’ can even make the food taste better. Dean and I grew up with that custom so it comes naturally to us. Our kids put up with it as they were growing up when we would all hold hands and pray before dining, even in a restaurant. Pausing for a moment of silence before a meal can be unifying. In fact, expressing gratitude for the blessings of your life and even for the challenges can keep your relationship on a positive track.
Dean and I each have a personal morning yoga and meditation practice. We often take a walk together, another great way to enhance our connection to each other and nature. In the evening after dinner, we enjoy meditating together. We love to tone and chant and that helps deepen our connection. When we confront life’s challenges and changes, we pray together for guidance and understanding. We see ourselves as spiritual beings in physical bodies and we need all the help we can get to maneuver the trials and tribulations of life.
A shared spiritual path and practice is a positive component of a healthy, happy relationship. And it can benefit the whole family, workplace, or collaborative group of people trying to accomplish a goal. Notice that watching television is not included in our daily habits. We often watch a movie or documentary, but then when it’s over, we turn off the TV and spend time just being together. We see mainstream media and network news as a huge distraction from the quality life experience we are seeking.
Here are two final thoughts to consider. Please know that honest and compassionate communication is probably the most important spiritual principle you can employ that will keep your relationship loving and trusting. And finally, don’t take things too seriously. Remember to laugh and enjoy life and each other. Having fun together will bring the greatest happiness to any partnership.
We hope you are finding creative ways of increasing spiritual partnership with your special friend. We would love to hear from you to learn how you and your partner enhance your relationship through spiritual practice. We send you hugs, peace and big love! Be sure to visit our website: www.soundings.com to learn more. And search Dean Evenson on all streaming services. #peacethroughmusic
Congratulations to yourself and Dean for being married so happily for 50 years. Thankyou for sharing your insights—so many ways to connect with your partner in deep and meaningful ways.