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How do I stop feeling like a victim?

Posted By Blisspot Wellbeing in Relationships on August 4, 2016

Answer: 1 • Score: 2 • Views: 5006
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    The opposite to feeling like a victim is to feel in our power or empowered. When we are empowered we feel strong, confident and free to live the life we want, regardless of others.

    Well-meaning people may have contributed to our self-image in ways that cause us to feel less than the divine, magnificent beings, that we are. The important thing is the past is the past, and if external ideas do not enhance our life, they do not belong to us. From this moment forward, it is possible to build a flourishing sense of self-confidence, by becoming very still and find out what is going on in our internal world. If our beliefs are not supporting the best possible version of ourselves, they are not true.

    Acceptance is the first step to feeling empowered—naming and accepting ANY feelings as they are right now without judgement. This technique, helps us to diffuse any internal pressure or stress, so that we can make the best decisions for ourselves. This is because, when we accept our anger for example, with compassion and grace, it no longer controls us, and we no longer feel and act in angry ways.

    We may be harbouring feelings of anger, for example, that our father walked out on us when we were six. This feeling of anger has never been expressed or validated (know as repression). In our current life, that feeling may be directed at inappropriate people, such as our children or partner. This feeling is driving our behaviour and is disempowering, as we are isolating ourselves from others, by being an angry person.

    The good news is that we can always validate our feelings now (even if they are from years ago) and allow them to pass through our energetic system, preventing us from acting out in inappropriate ways.

    Observing our feelings and letting them flow, makes it possible to be the master of our emotions, rather than our emotions mastering us. This inner stability allows us to live in a genuinely empowered state.

    From this sense of calm and peace, it is important to learn to speak our truth, or what is right for us. Victims generally feel as though they do not have a voice. If we are in a situation that is harmful to us we may need to speak to those involved. If is is a violent or volatile situation, it may not be safe to speak to that person directly and you may need to get some professional support to find out the safest course of action for yourself. However never put up with an abusive relationship, take the appropriate, safe action to sort it out.

    Victims can fall into the trap (understandably) of fear driving them and then creating a life based on those fearful thoughts. To create the fully empowered life of your dreams, visualise while meditating and focussing on what you want in a loving way.

    Focussing on your passions and the things that you do well allow you to feel empowered as you feel the joy of doing work that you love.

    Feeling like a victim can seem overwhelming and feel like you are trapped. However, EVERY PROBLEM IN LIFE HAS A SOLUTION. It may feel like you are unsupported, however, answers are everywhere if you look for them. If you are really overwhelmed or have intense feelings, counsellors and psychotherapists are there to support you, in working through your challenges. If money is an issue, contact a helpline in your country or find a support group. If feelings are less intense a trusted friend can be a great sounding board, in allowing you to work out what you need to do, as you step forward in your journey to empowerment.

    Getting out of your head and into your heart is a very powerful way in discovering the best answers for you. Chinese medicine views the heart as "The Emperor" of the body. The HeartMath Institute has recorded the heart to be approximately 60 times greater electrically and up to 5,000 times stronger magnetically than the brain. It is your wise, all knowing place that knows what is right for you. When we are still, meditating or in nature it is easier for us to hear the messages from our heart, safely driving us back to our true, empowered selves.

    So there are many ways and paths for us to overcome feeling like a victim and stepping into your true empowered selves feeling better, stronger and wiser than ever before.

    Deborah Tyson on February 9, 2017

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